Introducing… Sterling Robinson Tieman

Heyyyyyy… So I thought I should do a quick update since, you know, it has been a YEAR since I last wrote a blog post. I have contemplated on checking in or giving an update because this blog was never intended to be a pregnancy, post pregnancy, or mom blog. It was always a place to share my struggle through infertility. But I guess this blog wouldn’t be complete without the one thing that made this whole, crazy, rollercoaster journey worth it. So without further ado, I would like to introduce you to….

Miss Sterling Robinson Tieman

IMG_7367

Obviously she isn’t a newborn anymore- queue the ugly sad tears. Sterling is now 7 months old and “talking” and moving around like a wild banshee. She has been the sweetest and happiest baby I could have ever of hoped for. She is our little miracle. She is the one that was supposed to be.

So what now?

I feel like I want to write and share more. I want to write about how hard being pregnant was. How crazy, but amazing my labor and delivery were. How hard and rewarding motherhood is, and you know, everything and anything baby and mom related. I do not think this is the blog for that, I don’t know, maybe it is, or maybe it is time to start a new chapter on a different blog. What are your ladies thoughts? What did you do with your blog when and if you succeeded in growing your family? Do you think it is appropriate to blog about babies and motherhood on the same blog? 

Until then here is what I have to say to my fellow warriors, don’t loose hope. Do your research. Educate yourself. Take care of yourself mentally and physically. Pray. Love your partner hard. Keep fighting. The struggle is real. The payoff is priceless.

xoxo Rikki + Family

family photos

 

 

Advertisements
Standard

One Lovely Blog Award

Thank you sooo much coalescedreverie for nominating me for the One Lovely Blog Award. Wow. I am humbled. This is my first award that I have received and it means the world. Thanks again for the encouragement and love!

The rules for winning this award are very simple, here they are: 

1.  Thank the person who has nominated you and provide a link to his/her blog.

2.  List the rules.

3.  Include 7 facts about yourself.

4.  Nominate 15 other bloggers and let them know that they have been nominated.

5.  Display the award logo and follow the blogger who nominated you.

Here are 7 facts about me:

1. I am a music freak. I love every kind of music under the sun. I also have to be listening to music all day, everyday, day or night, whenever I am doing anything. My husband can’t understand why I don’t ever have a moment of silence, even when we are admiring the beauty of nature around us… Helloooo there is an awesome soundtrack that will go with that moment!

2. We live on 4 acres in what I like to call “the bungalow“. We have a dog, 9 chickens, and a huge garden. I have become somewhat of a farmer and I want to get goats next year 🙂

3. I LOVE to travel. We are so blessed to be able to do it as much as we do. I love exploring, learning new things, and experiencing old world culture. So lets plan our next trip.

4. I adore my parents. I have two moms {yes I was birthed to them- along with my sister- and they have been together for 30 years}. I love and respect them and genuinely enjoy their company. They are a couple of my best friends. We have date nights together, travel together, and see each other every day.

5. The word patience is not in my vocabulary.

6. I am not really into sweets. I don’t love dessert- never really have. I am more of a salty, give me a bag of chips, type of lady.

7. Nerd alert. I am obsessed with anything vampire or zombie. I am definitely waiting for the zombie apocalypse meets drinking human blood to escape and live forever moment happens.

onelovelyblog-award

Here are some, but not all of the blogs that I find lovely and would like to nominate for the Lovey Blog Award!

A Calm Persistence

Connie Ann’s

Ever Upward

Awaiting Autumn

Girl Gone Sober

Ladylove & Babydust

Love Marriage Infertility

Twelve Week Eternities

My Perfect Breakdown

Schrodinger’s Catbox 

Faith In Infertility

Bruised Banana

Where’s My Baby Bear?

Waiting For Baby Bird

Stalking The Stork

 

Standard

Essential Oils + Fertility

Yeah. Yeah. You have heard it again and again. Over and over from me. We are “taking a break” for a year to regroup and decide which direction we want to go in when the time comes. Since we will not be doing anything extreme or invasive for a while I have been researching a lot of holistic and natural ways of conceiving. I know what you might be thinking. Skeptical, wooheyy, whatever. I am too, but I feel like I am wasting time just sitting idly by when I can maybe do something positive to help my bod get into amazing baby making shape. I would wayyy rather conceive naturally than blow through my kids entire college fund before I even have one. Or better, blowing up my body with crazy meds and emotions to have it result in nothing other than a waste of time, energy, and money. I haven’t dived into the realm of oils, crystals {ok we do have a moonstone under our bed}, or eating totally crazy yet. I know it seems a little backwards- maybe I should have been doing this all along and in conjunction with. So heck why not? If anything I will smell pretty and maybe I will feel a little better too.

I recently became part of a group on Facebook called Fuller Life- Young Living. They are all about essential oils and natural remedies. I got the guts to post about our infertility “situation” and asked for advice on any oils that can be used to maximize fertility or help or anything. I was amazed at the responses I got back. Here is the advice I received::

“Please get the book Inner Transformation using Essential Oils, the success rate of ladies who struggle with the same infertility become pregnant using the guidelines in this book following the Colon cleanse etc. using the Young Living Supplements. It will be so worth it!”

“I used a similar product to pro plus (didn’t know about yl yet) plant base progesterone ointment……. went from dr saying I was not making any estrogen and therefor could not get pregnant to surprise eight weeks later, I might mention I believe god opens and closes the womb and we were also at Disney world, so there are a lot of variables there for me lol but I would love to pray for you guys and recommend oiling up with male booster like blue spruce and golden rod and maybe some pro plus and any other hormone oils, there are lots if you do some searching and trying what’s best for you. I have grown to love into the future as well and am reminded to pray over our future when I put it on. Best wishes!”

“This is Ken’s wife, Angie. I cannot find my book this evening to look it up, but I think Gary Young’s new book, “Ancient Einkorn” mentions infertility being one of the side-effects of GMO grain. Excellent book….”

“I have Doctor Leanne’s book Taming the Dragon and she mentions in the book that a certain cleanse has seen major results. Worth checking out:)”

“I’m not a dr and every case is different but I suffered myself and learned later & after much heartache, my unexplained infertility was due to a folic acid mutation deficiency.. Make sure your doc puts you on prescription folic acid and eat lots of healthy organic foods with folic acid. I would eat only organic while ttc… Following on what others suggest for YLO… Best of luck to you and your husband.”

“I went to a naturopath…..I had heavy cycles horrible cramps and very moody he told me it’s from too much estrogen and I took 3 supplements for a month and was preggo a month later!!!!!”

Inner Transformations!!! LeAnne Deardeuff spent many woman with that problem!”

“If you are high in estrogen, the try progessence plus to level out. Commit to at least 6 months with the oils. Continue the PP after you conceive until the pregnancy is firmly implanted and producing progesterone. Then start it back up at delivery to prevent post partum depression and mood swings.”

I got this concocktion for bumping up libido! {pun intended}

Orange Wong's photo.
Ranna Seah's photo.
“If you are going to try this, please use a organic tampon. 🙂 {obviously I want to try this one}”

 

WoW. I really loved all these responses and feel like they all have great information. I haven’t quite decided which direction I want to go in yet. I am still drinking Fertilitea twice a day. It tastes good and I didn’t feel my ovulation this month- which is weird I can always feel it and it hurts! So maybe my hormones are balancing out? IDK. I didn’t have a hormone problem to begin with. I don’t think. I really hate doctors. The more I learn about them the more I think they are idiots and too “by the book”. And they are insensitive. And blah. Anywho, sorry about the ADD. Back to oils. I already use some for when I get sick with a cough or cold or I cant sleep, so why not try it for fertility. I am probably going to purchase the Inner Transformations book or Taming the Dragon book or both. And that tampon thing. Why not. Ready go.

Standard

I want it NOW!!

Thank you Waiting For Baby Bird for posting this fantastic Blog Post. I really needed to be reminded that God’s timing is always perfect. He knows my story better than I do. I need not to lose trust and faith in Him. I am definitely Veruca Salt and I always want things when I want them. now. Now. NOW. Anyways enjoy this awesome post::

“Anyone remember Veruca Salt from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory? You know the bratty girl who stomped her foot and screamed, “I want it now!” That is sometimes me and when I read the story of Abraham and Sarah in the Old Testament and get to the intense part where she tells her husband to go sleep with another woman, I see that same bratty girl in my head. I see Sarah screaming to Abraham, “I want the child God promised and I want it now! So go sleep with my maidservant!” And of course, he does (rolling my eyes).

“Now Sarai, Abram’s wife, had borne him no children. But she had an Egyptian slave named Hagar, so she said to Abram, “The Lord has kept me from having children. Go, sleep with my slave; perhaps I can build a family through her.” Abram agreed to what Sarai said.” ~Genesis 16:1-2
So much of her journey and struggle parallels mine (being promised a son against all odds and then waiting and waiting some more), but this is one part of her story I am desperately trying to not parallel. No, I am not talking about the temptation of having my husband sleep with another woman to get the child He has promised, but rather the temptation to grow impatient with God and His incredibly slow ways that I begin wasting my time, energy, and money doing anything and everything I can in order to push ahead His timetable. So often I find myself awake at night thinking of what I could or should be doing in order to bring life to my womb sooner. I imagine Sarah also stayed awake at night, lying in bed and looking up at the roof of her tent thinking of different ways she could help God fulfill His promise.

If you are familiar with the story than you already know God promised old man Abraham that He would give him more descendents than he could count. Naturally, we know it would take at least one to get that process started, but as time passed, and the promise of a child wasn’t being fulfilled, Sarah, who was old and barren, started to panic. She might have thought God forgot? Maybe she got tired of hearing all of the advice from others on how to get pregnant?

I bet if you just go adopt the child three tents over then you will magically get pregnant!

Honey, just hold your legs up in the air after sex, it worked every time for me!

Just quit thinking about it and relax a little…

Maybe you and Abraham just need a vacation?

Are you sure the child God promised will come from your own body? Maybe you should explore other options?

Maybe she was tired of the isolation and shame that surrounded her as an infertile woman. Perhaps other people started calling her an enormous (not pregnant) fool for believing in a promise from God? Regardless of what caused her to think of this crazy idea of her husband sleeping with another woman, it was obvious that she had reached her limit. I believe her feelings of hopelessness and attitude of impatience clouded her faith and all she could think about was her present desire to have a child and her current failure to be able to do so. I have no doubt that she knew and believed in God’s promise to her, but when she didn’t conceive in the time frame she wanted (or expected) and concluded she probably wouldn’t, her impulsiveness, her impatience, and her intense yearning to be a mom caused her to think it was all up to her and that she must be the one to do something (and do it now) in order to make it happen. Her faith was built primarily on her ability rather than God’s ability.

Sure her plan was successful and she got a child named Ishmael, but as time would tell, he was not the son God had promised. Therefore, as a result of Sarah’s own plans, trouble was stirred. In one of the ugliest scenes imaginable, infertile Sarah “mistreated” Hagar, her maidservant, out of anger and deep grief. When I think about how agonizing and painful infertility can be, I can only imagine that Hagar took quite the beating. Furthermore, Sarah never found room in her heart to love Ishmael as her own. It’s troublesome to know that the bitterness, anger, stress and heartache was a direct result from of all of Sarah’s “doing” and never once was it in God’s plans.

Sarah’s actions have made me question how much bitterness, strife, anger, heartache, and stress in my life have been a direct result from the decisions I have impulsively made without seeking God’s will.

Thankfully despite their poor choices, the story goes on to say that God was still faithful to His word and He still fulfilled His promises because nearly 25 years after He had spoken to Abraham, Sarah conceived and gave birth to the long awaited son whom they named Issac. I can’t help but wonder if the reason it took nearly 25 years for God’s word to be fulfilled was because their own plans delayed God’s plans. To me that can be an unsettling thought to know that I could potentially cause a delay in God’s timing, but it’s also a thought that motivates me to always seek God’s wisdom before I start making my own plans. Sarah never sought wisdom from God on how to build her family. Instead, she let her “I want it now” attitude take over and it cost her more than she could afford.

I don’t ever want my “I want it now” attitude to persuade me down a path God never intended me to travel or possibly hinder me from having His best in my life. I don’t ever want my impatience to cause me to do things that are pointless and irrational, thus leading to more heartache, stress, financial debt, anxiety, and resentment. I don’t want to forget the truth that despite what the facts in my circumstances look like, God is faithful and nothing is too hard or impossible for Him. I don’t want to be so focused on my intense present desire to become a Mama bird that I am like Sarah and will do anything and everything except first ask for God’s plan, listen for His voice, trust in His timing and believe in His promises. Doing anything else would be a Hagar…pointless.”

Standard

Fertili{tea} = Fertility

Hopefully.

A couple months back I was doing a little holistic research on infertility and I came across this product:: Fertilitea {cute play on words}. It has amazing reviews, all natural herbs- things I have taken before and includes green tea which is my fave for so many reasons- and lots of women have gotten preggers. Now I am not saying this will be my “cure”, but heck since I am just sitting around and I have no medical reason why I can’t get pregnant I thought why not try this tea that may help my fertility.

I have noticed since stopping meds and treatments in June that my period has become shorter and shorter the last few months. I was usually at a 27-28 day cycle. It has gone from 26 to now 24 days. Weird. It is still “on time” but way short. Supposedly this tea helps “normalize” your cycle and help with sexual appetite- not a problem here, mood- I’m such a bitch, reproduction function, and regulating periods- although you can use it if you are already regular.

Anyways, starting now and giving it a go. I will let you know what happens in the next few months.

{ps cycle day 1 is today so it was perfect timing to start. Check out more on amazon.com for reviews and info about the tea. I would also be interested to know if any of you have tried it}

Standard